Wednesday, March 01, 2006


DSS Pussy Footing

March 18th 2005
Lisa Rendall never called back on me being able to see my daughter Nattassia.

She also did not call me back to inform me as to whether the foster Mom received the message I left with Lisa Rendall.

I getting tired of these people giving no answers


To Harm A Child


I Carlila Marie Sherman was told today by LisaRendall the case worker that she wanted to know if I was okay with the letter that she just gave?

She gave me a letter at the juvenile office as she was going to the bathroom. I wa sthere on a visit with my daughter Linda Rae.
They like to see if they could throw me off course.

But I stand up for the rights that I have and they don't like it.

I watch their every move for I don't trust them. So her giving me that letter there was made to throw me off.

The ploy didn't work. Lisa had come back and asked me if I read the letter. Little did she realize that by what she put in that letter that it was an instant denial of my parental rights.
I had asked for weekly visits with my other child Nattassia.

She put in the letter that even though I had asked for them that I could not have it. This is considered an alienation of my parental rights.
I have never been able to see this daughter until here recently.

Lisa asked me this day how I felt about what she had written?
I told her that I didn'tlike it.

That I am aloud to see my children at least once a week and I should be able to do just that. Lisa then asked me if I had done anything on the treatment plan.
I told her no. She asked why not?

I told Lisa first of all it is a color of the law violation put on that treatment plan. I told her second of all the
treatment plan is agains tmy religous beliefs and I will not comply with anything that does not go along with what my religous beliefs are.

This whole conversationstarted at 11:22 Am. It ended about two minutes before the foster mom had come.

I was suppose to have a visit with my baby.Yet it was like I was interogated. This visit was suppose to take placeat 11:30 AM. The foster mother Jeanne did not show up until 11:47 AM.

The thing is that she has always been late in showing up but just one time. Yet if I am late
they write it down. This whole conversation with Lisa was at 11:22 Am.

When the foster Mother Jeanne had shown up she was hatefull and did not show any kind of kindness to anyone not even to my baby whom she was holding.

When as we all were going through the doors and into the juvenile offices the foster mother Jeanne made the statement if she says anything damn thing to me then I will walk out of this building and go back through those doors. This was said to Lisa Rendall and for me to hear. My dad was there with me but as he was trying to walk on in is when Lisa Rendall had put her hand out to stop my dad from going through the doors and told him that she had needed to speak to him alone and was that okay with me? I told her yes just as long as you all hurry up. I went downstairs withthe foster mother and the nurse as we were getting ready to go down the stairs Jeanne handed me my baby girl.

Then she turned to Lisa Rendall and told her that if I say anything to her that she will walkout and leave. If one was to think about it she was going to abandon my baby.

That thought did not sit still with me. But that is what it sounded like to me. Lisa did reply back to her yes I know you will. So another words she was condoning her behavoir. It was even worse when we all went down stairs. Lisa was still upstairs when the next incident happened the
foster mother sat in one of the chairs in the toyroom we went into the room.
I sat on the floor with my baby.

When Linda Rae triedt o crawl over to the fostermom Jeanne lap she yell at Linda Rae and told her no don't climb on my lap have your visit with your mother. I could not believe what Jeanne did next.

My daughter ignored her so she picked her up by her arms and threw her on her bottom on the floor.

Linda Rae was sitting there stunedby the abuse that she had received. I had to keepcounting to twenty. I was so mad I wanted to harm her for abusing my child. Noone should ever have to put up with the abuse and this includes my baby.

I knew that she could of harmed my baby even more cause it was only a few minutes later and she did it again and even harder then what she had done a few minutes before my baby had a tear in her eye. I don't believe that she really understood that the foster mom was taking abuse that she wanted to do on me on my child.

I finished visiting my baby and when I was getting ready to leave Lisa Rendall asked me how the visit went. I told Lisa I didn't really appreciate Jeanne slamming my baby onto the floor. Lisa stated that she was sorry that she missed seeing that and it must of happened when she was still upstairs with my dad. Yet nothing was done about this.
I still walked out of there really upset.


DFS / DSS Vacation

February 23rd 2006

I have been trying to get a hold of this case worker Lisa Rendal for almost two weeks now.

She seems to never be there
I have called her almost every day but yesturday.
t seems that she just keeps leaving for vacation. Four days last week and four days the week before including the weekend. HMmmmm????

Is she never there? Check it out her supervisor is on vacation until
January 13 too?
Guess what it is now February.
So I am to take it that Cindy Vanbuskirk is gone until next year?
What a joke.


Moving Child Again


At 9:21 AM I was informed by Lisa Rendall they moved my child Nattassia to a foster home. I then asked Lisa if I could see if my child was okay?

She stated that I would have to wait until they made sure that my daughter was settled in and then ask her supervisor if I could visit with her.
She promised me a phone call back.


Moved Child Again

I was notified by Lisa Rendall that they just upped and moved my child from her Grandparents to the boys and Girls town.I was notified on November 30th 2004 about this being done.


Lies, Lies And Big Lies


Department of SocialServices had stated in these documents that were put in the court that my daughter said that she would be fine without being able to see me.

If this was so then why did my daughter talk to me 5 times and left one message with my mother?

These calls were on November 6th 2003. My daughter was highly upset.

Nattassia was almost to the point of being histerical cause of the nasty things DFStold her.

DFS went so far to tell her that I didn't Love her.

She was so frantic that she threatened to killher self.

When they had told my daughter this nasty stuff they even showed her some court documents stating that I didn't show up for court because I was putting the baby up for adoption.

These people had lied so bad to her that it took me a long time to convince her that these people were lying to her.

How could they do these things to my baby? My God is this right to do to a kid? In my books it is what I call mental abuse. Not a very pretty thing to do.

On number 3 on the their part for their treatment plan it states Ms. Sherman has moved in with her parents.

This is wrong cause I live with my mother. It also had stated that due to her report that her father had sexually abused her and physically threatening to her as a child.
I never said that.

They are wrong I was in fact sexually assaulted by Mr. Donald Green and physically threatened by him and also by them. Not my dad for he has never ever harmed me, Physically,Mentally or by any sexual abuse.

Plus I don't call my dad father. I call God my father. For what they wrote down is another lie made up by DFS. This is slander, yet my dad wont sue them.

On number 6 of treatmentplan it states that DFShad to redirect me. This is also another lie. Not until two weeks in August did they ever hand me a copy of their rules.

They handed me this piece ofpaper knowing that I am Partial Dislexic. Which I had let them know on June 11th 2003. I had no idea what the paper was.

Thank God for my kid knowing that you can not just hand me something to read without giving me some help. For she yanked the pieceof paper out of my hand and jumped Holly Cooper cause of the paper had a statement on it that was saying that at no given time can I give her a hug.

She did all this before the caseworker could retrieve it from her hands. She told them that if I had not of been able to that that she would of thought that I didn't Love her any more. She read at the bottom where I could not discuss the case or anything about this with her.

She was mad. Don't you just love kids who are smarter then them? I had no idea what the paper was that DFS had given me until my child jumped them. I was told that I could read it or not and it did not seemto matter to them if Idid or not. I never had even tried to read it cause it was hogwash.

On number 8 that was put into these court documents I was already in parenting classes, yet DFS refused for me to finish my last three classes which involved me having my kid for them.
This was so that I could finish up my classes. This was not fair for them to put it in court that I was not taking them.

On number 10 it was
put into DFS stating that I would tell my daughter what I was doing with other men.

I am a very private person. That is why I am finding it hard to tell people all about what has gone on and the fact that not until Jan 2004 did anyone begin to know about me being in the care of DFS when I was a child and being abused by the system. I kept it to myself and only told parts at that time to my own mother.

I began telling when DFS had put it in their own court room and were slandering me right and left about it and other things. I was then left with no choice.

Plus they had made me a promise that they would never try to harm my dad nor my mom. Yet they had slandered him in opened court and now all bets were considered off.

I knew that it was time and they left me with no choice but to tell everyone.

This is why I didn't try to discuss men with my own daughter. I didn't bring it up but she would by trying to get info out of me on whom was I seeing and questions on Rodger. I just wanted her to leave me alone on questions on him and I was always telling her that. She would bring up Rodger and kept asking if he was gone? I finally told her yes. I really believed that she had a right to know. I had never believed in lying to my child. I had lied once before and it had cost me. It states that there were notes found among my daughters things that my daughters foster mom had said that she found.This is also a another false statement made.

I had made a through check of my daughters stuff myself. I even changed the CD cases to new ones and I was the one whof ound the notes to my daughter and me from Rodger. I gave them toDFS. I gave those to Cleo Moehl. Nattassia's purse was never given to her because of those notes being in there. So I threw away her purse.

Also her Grandma Benton is the one who brought CDS to DFS from Rodger in a bag. Rodger had them from the apartment and gave them to Grandma Benton. He wanted to make sure thatNattassia got them. I have never said that I am not willing to give up sex for my daughter. Nattassia was not ever shown any pornography by me. The men that I was talking to could not seeNattassia on my cam. To my knowledge she was only on there 4 times. You see if she came near the kitchen I immediately would point the cam to the floor.

I was doing my best to try every way to get this man Rodger out of my house. I tried getting him arrested. I told my dad that he stated that he had a warrant out on him. My dad said that he would take care of it. So he informed my ex and he called the cops for my dad. If I ever gave a cop a false social security number don't you think that They would of locked me up behind bars. Well that is what Rodger did on March 18th 2003.

They took my daughter on June 10th 2003. Yet kept him in my house even though he had stabbed me and 2 months after they took my daughter they tell me that he was having sex with my daughter and had just done it with her within the last three days of them taking her.

They said they couldn't find no warrant. The warrant was found in November 2003. If the cops would of arrested Rodger Curry Jr. on March 18th of that year then he wouldn't of been touching my daughter.

The SpringfieldPolice Department is guilty of the continuation of sexual abuse on my daughter on not doing their job of putting this man away on a warrant out for his arrest.I never had any idea as to what was going on. My daughter gave no indication. I justw anted him to quit beating me up. Which he did at least once every day. But never in front of my child.

The Police department failed to do their job in arresting him.Every day I think of what these police officers did not do to save me and now her too. Why did they let him get away on March 18th2003 and then again on the night of June9 th 2003?

I ended up get my throat sliced 14 times in between that time frame. My head was thrown threw a wall 7 times. He cut into my chest twice. My stomache once. Cause as he kept telling me the cops let him get away with it and if I ever called them again he would be able to get away with murder. As you can tell from all that DSS keeps putting with the lies in court this man Rodger Ronald Curry Jr. is winning from a prison cell. From what I can see they are letting him win.

Is this the way america wants people whom try killing or beating a person to do? I wouldn't think so. If this is the way America is run then I want no part of America.

Rodger was never charged with assault on me.They charged him with only sexual abuse. 5 counts. How many other people are going to let your own government do this to you?
The next person may actually end up dead because of the failure of our own system. It's nice of our system to let a man win from a prison cell.


Lawyer Stalls

JANUARY 13TH 2004 I called my lawyer this morning at 8:00Am.

I asked Chris Hazzlerig to find out what happened to my daughter Nattassia.

He told me that he didn't have any idea as to what I was talking about.

I told him about Holly Coopers visit the day before. He said okay so you think your kid is dead is what you are saying? He acted like I was loosing my mind.
By him making the statement that he didn't have a clue as to what I was talking about. I hung up the phone after I told him to please find out.

Yet this entered another new caseworker by them doing this to me. Her name is Beth Cox or rather Elizabeth Cox.


Judge Breaks Laws

JANUARY 14TH 2004 I was still terribly upset this day.

I couldn't understand why I was still having court when DFS not even 2 days before court informed me that my daughter Nattassia is dead.

My lawyer ignores me. He wouldn't return any of my calls the rest of yesturday and this morning. Here I am pregnant and it is like DFS (DSS) is trying more and more to upset me.

In this day in court the J udge, Thomas Mountjoy said that they wanted me to sign a piece of paper for the medical records on my unborn child. So that when the time comes they can come and take my baby away from me.

Due to the problems with my unborn child the doctors ordered me to have absolutely no stress.Yet Cleo Moehl and Holly Cooper have all been informed of this.Yet according to ther New Hippa Law they can't court order this in Juvenile court unless convicted of a felony. Yet they did this anyways.

It is also against theMissouri State Statues. Judge Thomas Mountjoy did this and step by step the state of Missouri keeps trying to harm my unborn child.
No stress means no stress.


Investigation Summary

Investigated Summary For June 25 2004

I never ever sexually abused my child. They never gave me papers on this charge until January 12th 2004.

So my question is how can these charges be substansiated?

They also told me on July 7th 2004 that they want me to still be going with my psychologist Dr. Jack Greenhall.

Jack Greenhall gave me a medical release on June 30th 2004. He did this due to my Medicaid running out and he told me that I really didn’t need him cause I am strong and that if I did I was to pick up the phone and call him.

On this summary they keep saying my past mental history. The only past mental history is with DFS. And I could tell you personally about all the abuse that I received at the hands of DFS and Judge Mountjoy.

I can tell you the truth anything from abuse to sexual abuse at the hands of them and things that were done to keep me quite. If this is what you wish then I will tell you all about it.

I have never said that I couldn’t manage my diabetes. What I said is that it is hard to control it cause my diabetes fluxuates way too much.

Also I called Caroline Benton to tell her about the baby on April 8th 2004. The thing was she informed me that Holly Cooper already had called her on the baby being born.

I never gave Holly Cooper permission to do this. According to the Hipaa law this was and is illegal to do.

Holly Cooper is only a DFS worker and they had change the name to DSS. This conversation on the top part was all on tape that was made on the day of the investigated summary.


Threat Letter

January 27th 2006
I Carlila Sherman received a letter in the mail. I call it the hate letter.
It was mailed to me from a caseworker dated for January 24th 2006.
This is what the letter says.

Dear Ms Sherman:

I recently received a phone call from state office in Jefferson City, Mo. reguarding a recent visit you had with your child.

I was not aware of your conserns because you did not inform me of them.

In the future, it would be helpful if you would address any questions or conserns you have to me before pursuing other avenues.

If you have any questions or conserns, please call me at417-895-7879.

Thank you.
Lisa Rendall

I called Lisa to leave this message.

This is Carlila Sherman at this number. First of all you were informed yet you just shrugged it off like it was no big deal.

You were informed several other times over the last few months. I even have a witness to the fact of one of them that you were informed about a month ago after one of my visits with my baby girl.

I just received the letter.
I didn'tappreciate your threatening letter that you sent me.

I do not appreciate you lying by telling people that you didn't have it told to you.I wish to please have a reply back on this. Thank you very much and have a good day. This phone call was made at 3:53 PM. on this Friday yet noone called back. I havea witness that this phone message was made.

Maybe I was a little too abrupt but after a while you get tired of the lies.

I keep fighting but to me this letter also felt like I was being threatened.


Documents Finally Given

January 12th 2004 This is the date that Kate Lowry gave me court documents for all of the last few months of my case that I had kept asking forever since they took my child Nattassia on June 10th 2003.

I had only received a few documents from my attorney on Oct.28th 2003. Other wise no other known documents even from the mail lady.

One certifield envelope with nothing in it was sent to me on June 13th 2003. The documents had many bad statements in them. They put that I had seen my daughter and Rodger together with their pants down and yet did nothinga bout it.

I hate to say it but if I would of seen that I would of killed him.

This is discusting and itis very perverted how DFS can put words in your mouth by stating you said that.

Read the next excert and things go from bad to worse.


Denied Rights Again

February 2nd 2006

I called the socialworker Lisa Rendall this morning at 9:23.

I told her first that I did not ask her fora copy of the treatment plan but for a copy of the court order from the judge that statesthat I need to obey the treatment plan.

Lisa told me that it's considered a standing court order signed on the treatment plan because the judge had signed the treatment plan at the bottom of it.

Little does sheknow the law states that if there is any court orders done and that if you are going to tell someone there is a court order then that court order is to of been given to the person to which it was issued within the first 72 hours after it was first admitted into the court room by a peace officer of the law.

This has never been done nor given by a peace officer of thelaw.

I will check Ms.Lisa Rendalls automatic court ordered treatment plan. I am willing to bet it is invalid and against the law. This will be the first one from my youngest child as to which I will of seen with a judges signature.

It will suprise me. Plus it is automatic that it is considered to be invalid seeing how a peace officer did not come to my door and ask for a signature that it was received by me.

I then switched thec onversation and told Lisa that I still do not have my advocate with me and that I am aloud to have one.

She told me we had already gone over this Carlila.That you are aloud to have you parents there and only if the person has been approved by them after all it'sonly a visit with your child and she doesn't see what the big deal is?

I told her that I have the legal right to have an advocate with me at all times. That the law states that I am aloud to have an advocate with
me at any given time.

Lisa told me that she fails to see the difference between my parents or an advocate.

I told herthat an advocate isimpartial and that this is the difference.Lisa then stated thata parent can be impartialand that she really doesn'tunderstand. I told her that my dad does not know of the abuse I had while I was in the system. That is when Lisa told me isn't it time for you to tell him about it? I told her that I would tell him when I wanted to.

I was thinking what right does this caseworker have to tell me when and hom I could tell someone about something I have kept a secret for so long?

It should be my choice. Not hers.

But as I explained to Lisa he is impartial because of this and will always be for he was not told when this had happened.

I had finally gotten Lisa to say it was okay for at least my mom to go with me to the visit.This is rediculous I am not aloud to have ana dvocate go with me.

I have demanded my rights left and right yet I am being denied my rights.


Cruel Intentions


It is two days before court.

Here I am already upset by my earlier paper-work that DFS had given me.
But to make matters worse

Holly Cooper (DFS worker)
came to see me at 5:18 PM.

I thought she no longer was on the case because earlier Kate Lowry was the one to give those papers to me.

I had been sitting outside on my usual step reading when she came up to me.

Holly Cooper told me that she had somethin to tell me and it was rather important.

I said okay go ahead and shoot and tell me what's on your mind. She asked me am I sure that she could tell me right? I said go ahead I have no secrets. She looked down and then told me to pre-pare myself.

She even started scuffing her shoes back and forth.

By now she was making me nervous.
I am pregnant and every little thing bugs me with people whom start acting strange like that.

I told her to please get out what she had come to let me know. For the suspense is killing me.

She looked at me and then told me that due to some unfortunate accident my daughter Nattassia is dead.

I then asked her how this could of happened to my daughter?

She then apologigized and stated
hat they were looking into it.

Not soon after did Holly keep stuttering and then she decided it was best to leave.

As she was leaving I was left there to cryfor my baby.

It took me almost 6 months to find out that she lied to me.

I kept asking for a burialfor her.

Yet Holly had disappeared after that.

What a cruel trick to tell a parent such a lie and right before court.

Find out what other cruelity they could give me.


To See My Kid

Left a message with LisaRendall the caseworker to see if I could see my one daughter Nattassia Saloisat least once a week.

I will wait for a reply on this but I am not having much hope that DSS will comply. They haven't done this any time yet. So who knows what their reply will be on this?

The time I made this phone call and left this message is 12:49PM.
Today is a Thursday.


Asking For A Jury

JANUARY 14TH 2004 CONT'D Right before court I had asked Chris Hazzlerigg to get me a jury of my peers and to do it now.

He gave me a dirty look and walked away from me.

Then he went into the back area withDSS.

Comes back out all he can say is come on let's go, follow me please.

He would never tell me an answer so I figured I would ask Mounjoy myself. I will be polite about it.

In the middle of court I tried to tell Mountjoy but he shut me up and told me that I would refrain from speaking in court and thatI was not aloud to speak or I would receive a comtempt of court and my attorney ist o redirect me.

He then told me to sit down and shutup.

I have no right to speak. This upset me greatly. After court Chris Hazzlerigg had me in tears forcing me to sign on my medical rights. I have a witness that I kept telling him no.

He made a promise that if I did then they would let me keep my baby.

He lied.


Admendment 14th Act Abolished

Admendment 14th Act Abolished For Month Of July 2004 My daughter Linda Rae Salois had two surgeries thateven though I have my parental rights. The hospital never once had me even sign for permission to sign for the surgeries.I would of don it if the had asked me to. They even moved Linda Rae to Rankin hospital yet they still didn’t have me sign for anything. Noteven all the 3 times that she was moved. DFS and so far Childrens Hospital has gone against my fourteenth admendment rights, the childrens act one. These peoplebelieve that they can get away with it. The refusal to let me sign for anything medical on any of my children is abonible. To totally go against the law. Yet when I brought it up to DFS they inform me that they can do whatever they want. Beth Cox and Cleo Mole told me this. I even let Melissa Bruder atChildren’s Hospital know this when I finally caughtup with her on July 30th2004. She told me that they know what they are doing for they have done this for several years now. Melissa told me that they did not need my signature for Beth CDox told her that I would try to pull some kind of stunt like this and that the ony signature that they need is from DFS and Beth Coxis from there. She said thies is because DFS has custody and I don’t she says. Melissa told me that the minute that DFS took custody of Linda Rae that I have no rights or say so with my daughter. Melissa Bruder is on the 7th floor she is a social worker for St.Louis Childrens Hospital. This was said to me at 3:57PM July 30th 2004. She also told me that my stepmom and I had to leave the hospital by Saturday afternoon. That in order for me to ever see my daughter again I have to send DFS a notorized letter to DFS and certified. I say to myself what in the heck is going on?Admendment 14th Act Abolished For Month Of July 2004


Alienation Of Parent

January 19th 2006 I showed up to see my daughter Linda Rae today.My little baby girl who is not yet 2 years of age.My appointment was at the juvenile court house. The time was supposse to of been at 11:30am. I showedup at 11:21am. My stepmom showed up shortly behind me. They had to call LisaRendall the caseworker inorder for her to get there.They could not find the foster mothers phone number to call to see where she was at. It seems that noone had the number but LisaRendall. That's not good.Noone seems to have a phone number for the foster Mother but one? So wrong.What happens if somethinghappened to Lisa Rendall?Then noone could find mybaby. This is not doingwell within the system. I noticed that when Lisa Rendall had first walked in 7 minutes late as usualthat she was wearing a cross.Well here recently I put something into court aboutmy religion. I had alsomade the statement thatin order to be ordained by God that most people wear a cross. She doesn'twant to be said that sheis an athiest too. That's what it appeared to me.But after all I am just a witness to what she is doing. It will be Godsjob as to whether sheshould be banished fromhim when she dies. I amalways watching These DSSworkers now. I have never seen so much evil in my life. Yet I am just a witness for God. I can'thelp but laugh at thethings people will doto try and make peoplethink that they willchange and for God. Orare they? The next thing thathappened was my childsfoster mom coming in 14minutes late. I tried toget my baby from her andshe told me no and that she was giving her to her Grandmother. Thisis my stepmom. My step-mom told Jeanne that itwas my visit not hers and that the baby wasto go to me. Jeanne thefoster mother stated shedidn't feel like hearingLinda cry because my baby always cried with meand she doesn't seem tolike me. So she went ahead and handed my baby to my stepmom. I toldLisa Rendall that that isn't right and she does this every time I have a visit with my baby. LisaRendall just smiled and shrugged her shoulders.Then we were shown intothe visiting room that was down stairs. When I was a kid this area wasthe torture area becausekids were tortured andbeaten up there by DFSworkers. I don't know if it still runs under the juvenile hall areabut it use to. I havealways remembered the tortured screams of thechildren and them tellingme to ignore it and toconcentrate on my Karateclasses instead. Youcouldn't ignore thesechildren screaming for them to please stop it.Stop hitting me. I lovedtheir padded rooms in the juvenile hall. They were so white. I feel kind ofoff kilter going down tothe basement. It seemslike my mind starts togo back in time. Like it's doing right now.I remember too much. Isee people whom were there whom are the caseworkers and some of the same ones I had known before. They walk past the door to theroom we are in almost every time were there.Their usually the oneswhom abused all of thechildren. I don't want the past to of innertwined,but I know that now whether I like it or not the past hasbeen getting ready tohit me head on. Anger,despair, hurts, andfrankly frightenedbecause I was neveraloud to do this asa child. I feel quitelost and breathlessabout life. But hereI am in a buildingthat I can still hearthe screams down the halls. Yet I have tofocus on my daughterand try and act normal.Yet nothing is normalfor me with this. I am doing my best towatch my daughter andwhat she is doing. Ilike watching her butI hate the fact thatthe foster mom rubs itin that my daughter hasbeen calling her mom. She should of correctedher along time ago andtold her that I am hermother yet she has notdone this. Even my ownstepmom is calling herthe foster mom Jeannemomma. This is all a form of alienation ofthe parent and child
relationship. They are disavoweling me with my baby. Some times Iget to see her twice a month. Other times it is once. In order to uphold the law youmust let the parentssee the child once aweek continuely. This has not been done ever.The same with my otherchild Nattassia. I didnot get to see her fortwo years and 5 months.They have had alot oftime to brainwash her.Which from my point ofview they have done just that. I was also told on myvisit here with this daughter that I can not see my other daughter for at least another 3to 4 weeks. This is yet another alienation done on that child too. When do I ever get to see my children again? One in 2 weeks.
This is wrong.


Call To Case Worker

I called the caseworker Lisa Rendall at 8:26 am today on March 15th 2005. I told her first that I wanted to visit with both of my children Nattassia and Linda Rae. Lisa told me that she would have to ask her supervisor. I told Lisa that I would like to visit with my daughter sometime soon. She said that she would inform them about it like she had already stated the first time around. I then asked how Linda Rae was doing? Lisa told me fine as far as to be exspected. This is when I explained to her one of the most important reasons why I was calling her because of the phone call that my cousin Pam had called the night before, on March 14th 2005. I told her the reason that Pam had called and the phone call was because my Cousin Chuck had a heart attack this weekend and that in doing so it seems my cousin Chuck had to have both of his stint valves put in like Linda Rae did. I explained about what the doctor had said to my cousins about congenital heart disease. That my cousin had had it all of his life and that one of the main things is to watch for is high or low blood presure. I told Lisa about my cousin asking the doctor about children having it since Linda Rae Salois has it. The doctor told my cousins that the blood presure needs to be checked at least 1-2 times a day by the caregiver. The reason for this the doctor said was because a child could die in thier sleep. If this is not done. For he said that children are more adept as even Adults are to do this in thier sleep too. But alot of times no one checks for the blood presure and that this needs to be especially done on children. This is everything thing that I had told Lisa Rendall on this. When I got done she told me that she would call the foster Mother and let her know to do this. After I told her all of this that is when I asked her,"as to when I was going to get another visit with my daughter Linda Rae?" She told me that she would find out by Wensday to Friday and let me know by then . She asked me," Is that okay with you?" Because for the next few weeks I am really swamped with court and it might be next week or the week after. I told Lisa, "that that would be fine and I will wait for her phone call within the next few days." After that was all said and done Lisa, {whom is the caseworker} thanked me for letting her know what had happened to my cousin, as to what Chucks heart doctor had said about Linda Rae and her blood presure being checked 1-2 times a day and that she would make sure to inform her foster Mother about doing so. I told her okay and sorry but just trying to take precautions. I let her know that the reason for this is cause my cousin had gone into the hospital with very high blood presure and that this is what had prompted my other Cousin Pam to ask the doctor about children for Linda Rae's sake. Lisa said that it was good for me to inform her of this information, but that she did need to go so that she could call the foster mother on this. Before I could say anything else she had already hungup on me. Hangup time was 8:40Am. After I got off of the phone my mom asked, "who were you talking to?" She then stated you talked loud enough to wake me from my sleep. I could here you. So who were you telling about my nephew Chuck and the blood Presure too? I told her that it had been Lisa Rendall and all of what I I had found out about the blood presure and that my cousin had had exstremely high blood presure. My mom had been on the phone March 14th when my cousin had told us about the goings on with Chuck and that she had asked the doctor questions about congenital heart disease. So I told my mom that I had called Lisa to tell her about it and that they need to be checking her blood presure 1-2 times a day. I explained this to my Mother at 8:40 am right after I had gotten off the phone with Lisa Rendall. I then called my stepmom and let her know about my cousin and what happened to him. I told her that I had called Lisa Rendall and told her about the fact that they need to check her blood presure at least 1 to 2 times a day. This was call was made at 8:42Am. After calling Linda, I called Ronnie Dean at 8:44Am. I told him about me calling Lisa Rendall the case- worker. I told him what I had told told Lisa about my cousin having a heart attack and about the fact that they need to check my daughters blood presure at least 1-2 times a day. I informed Ronnie that I had let Lisa Rendall know about this and the fact that if this is not done then my daughter could very easily die in her sleep. I told him as I told Lisa that this is what my cousin Pam had told me cause she had asked the her brothers heart doctor about this. I told Ronnie about my cousins high blood presure and that I had also informed the case worker that Chuck had this. I finished the phone call from Ronnie Dean at 8:47. I had informed all four of these people about this info. Even though my Mom had been on the phone with me last night when my cousin called, she still had wanted to know whom I had been talking to and what did I tell them. So I told her.
Signed this 15th day of March 2005 By Carlila Marie Sherman (Salois)

Tuesday, January 17, 2006



IN THE INTEREST OF: ) ) Nattassia M. Salois ) Case No. 103JUO282 (dob: 05/31/1990) )
And AND Linda Rae Salois ) (dob: 04/08/2004) ) ) Case No. 104JUO315 ) AFFIDAVIT IN SUPPORT OF CARLILA SHERMAN No.101668K
COMES NOW Carlila Sherman, Mother Of Child Nattassia Marie Salois
and Linda Rae Salois of Greene County Missouri and states to the Court as follows:
MOTION FOR THE CONTINUATION OF RELIGOUS BELIEFS AND --------------------------------------------------- THE ESTABLISHMENT OF ONE CARLILA MARIE SHERMAN AND --------------------------------------------------- HER RELIGOUS BELIEFS 1. This petition is filed in reguards to both children Nattassia Marie Salois born on 5/31/90 and Linda Rae Salois born on 4/8/04.
Religous Beliefs continued on Carlila Marie Sherman. First Ammendment Rights give Carlila Marie Sherman the right to inform the juvenile court of Religous Beliefs so that they don't go above and beyond the Rights of Carlila Marie Sherman. Religous beliefs include Carlila Marie Sherman the right to excercise the fact that in the way she was brought up by religion, that a person whom is within God's way of light does not and can not have the following done. Number one: if pregnant with child one must never try to kill their unborn child by Suicide or murder. Number Two: One must never abort said child. Number Three: One must never adopt any child out or sell such a child. The Number three would go along with the same thing as if someone deliberately took away Parental Rights from Parent on any children. If this is to happen then by any such of a person taking away Parental Rights is deliberately trying to take away Carlila Marie Shermans Religous beliefs. In accordance with the First Ammendment Rights noone whom is an officer within the bounds of the law shall ever make a judgement nor law against the Freedom of Religon or the Establishment of Religous beliefs, or abridging the Freedom of Speech, or of the Press, or the Right of the people to Peacefully Assemble, and to petition the goverment for a redress of grievances. This also includes Congress. I Carlila Marie Sherman was brought up this way by my Roman Catholic Church's along with the readings in the BIBLE. This is the way I was taught. I wish to have this established in this Juvenile Court Room as of today. I have not as of yet received any notice of an attorney. So I Carlila Marie Sherman am entering my plea on behalf of my Religion and the Religous Beliefs that I Carlila Marie Sherman was brought up on. No persons shall also state that CARLILA MARIE SHERMAN is insane or mentally incapable of taking care of her children. This also goes against Carlila Marie Sherman's religous beliefs. I want this established in this court room too. It states in the Bible that people will say things like that in order to harm a persons soul deliberately. Meaning that it would and is a an attempt to try and destroy Carlila Marie Sherman's belief in God and her well being for the sake of her soul within. Andy Ridagor is Linda Rae Salois Dad, and I am making a plea on the behalf of him. This is due to the fact that Andy Ridagor is also of the same Religion and he is also full blooded Indian and is from Oklahoma. He does not know of the existance of his daughter and I believe that he does have a right to know. Their is noone from Department of Social Services whom has even tried to get a hold of him. His last known address was on Jefferson. His last phone number 417-619-1270. Andy also has the right for it to be known in this court that if his parental rights are being taken away then his 14th Ammendment Rights/Bill of Rights will and have been broken and Indian Rights to his child. The Parent-child relationship is important to the people all over this country and should not be abolished.
__________________________________Date: ______/_____/______
On _______________ before me, ___________________________ ,personally
appeared ________________________ , personally known to me (or proved to me on the basis of satisfactory evidence) to be the persons whose names is in thier authorized capacities, and that by thier signatures on this instrument the persons, or the entity upon behalf of which the persons acted, executed this instrument. I witnessed by my hand and official seal

Signer: ____________known ____________unknown

__________________________ (Seal)



I was put back intothe Hospital after Ihad already been in the Hospital because I was having trouble breathing on November 14th 2003. This timeI was transfered fromone hospital to theother which was CoxNorth to Cox South.This was because amistake was made onNovember 14th 2003when the Cox NorthHospital decided tosend me back homeafter I was having breathing capacitiesof only 60%. Yet Iwas sent back homeby mistake. On November 16th I had tried to go to Urgent Care at Cox Walnu Lawn. Iwas refused me care first cause I didn't have permission from my doctor to go eventhough I was having difficulty in breathing.I couldn't catch my breath and they hadrefused to give mecare until I had infact contacted mydoctors at least one of them. So I didthat and yet theyrefused to give mecare again cause Ididn't get a hold of the doctor when I firsthad gone there. What in the heck is going on when noone will treat you when you can't breathe? I was gaspingfor breath and theywere acting like I needed to keel over and die. My own personal doctor told me whenI called him back togo back to Cox Northand tell them to fixwhat they screwed up.I went back across town and did this inturn my brathing rate had dropped even lower.I was put on a temporarybreathing tube. Until they could get my statsback up. Then a doctor came in and told methat they needed totransfer me to CoxSouth. I asked him,"Why? What is goingon?" He told me thata heart doctor was over there and thatthey didn't have onethere at this hospital.Go figure a billiondollar hospital did not have any heartdoctors at this onehospital. They were all at one of theirother hospitals. Heapologized about theirhospital making the mistake of sending me home on such low of myability of breathing air. I was upset aboutthis whole ordeal. Of course I had to go and take myself there for all the ambulances werebusy at that time. Whatluck. A person gets totake themselves to be transfered to another Hospital. It took me some timeto get up and movingaround to get to theother side of town. Iwas lucky that I didn't die. I ended up havingpnuemonia, the flu andbeing a type 2 diabetic.Which means that whenthe other hospital infact only had given me crackers to eat withinthose twenty somethinghours means that isintentually trying tokill someone. I wasdang lucky that I didn'tgo into a diabetic coma.I was put through severalsteps to make sure thatI was going to live. Iwas given plenty of thesebreathing treatments by them and put on oxygen.I had people coming intomy room to teach me how to manage my diabeticways and know hows. I learned all I could in those days and eventoday about diabeties.I was very upset at thetreatment I had receivedby all these two hospitals.I am clostraphobic and theykept shuting my bedroomdoor. I couldn't stand it.I picked up the phone andcalled my Power of Attorney.He kept calling them andtelling them not to shut my bedroom door. They keptdoing it. Finally he calledthem again and told them that if they did it againthey were going to be sued.They finally posted a note on my bedroom door telling people not to shut it. Ionly had one whom did itsince then and the head nurse jumped her for notreading the sign. Boy wasI happier to get out of there. I missed my mom andalso my dad and his companyChristmas Party. I felt aprisoner of the hospitals.



NOVEMBER 7TH 2003 I called the presidentof my group Families ForChange and I told him that my child is upsetand she called me the night before. RonnieDean told me that he would meet me on thesquare and that we hadneeded to do somethingabout this now. We metup on the square and I told him everythingthat she told me the night before and how upset she was. He askedwho my caseworker was and I told him that Ihave two of them. He said oh what fun togive you two of thesepeople. Well come onand we'll take this tothem and see what is going on and why are they doing this to her.I taped the whole entireconversation. It wasKate Lowry's day toman the plate and sheswore that they were not doing this to my child. Boy what the liars would do for a good kick as to just lie some more to me.Ronnie and I leftthe building and Iwas left feeling thatI was hopeless to helpmy own child. She wassuppose to call me backSaturday. Unfortunatelyshe didn't because as I found out later on they caught her calling me and locked her in herroom. Yet they kept heraway from me for almost 2 1/2 years and neveronce would they let mesee her.



11 NOVEMBER 6TH 2003 My daughter called meto yell at me for hernot being able to seeme. This Department of Social Services Workershad told my daughter Iwas insane and I wasgiving her up for anadoption along with mybaby. They showed herpaperwork and toldher see your mom issigning you both away.She was mad at me andactually beieved them.She called six timesthat night. They watchher every move to makesure that she could not make a phone call so she was calling mefrom a pay phone forthe foster mom had already slammed her fingers in a phonebecause she triedto call me. As faras I am consernedthis was against mychilds right to herhaving freedom andthis is also can beconstrued as abuse. My daughter calledfrom 4:30PM on. Shehad told me that shehad kept telling themthat they wanted her to live with them yetthey refused for herto go home and shewas promised that she could do that.Yet she had told them that she lied to them about me.This is even in myown paperwork towhere it statesthat she took itback. Yet they didn't put it in court. They keepputting bad stuffabout me in court.I keep fighting with all of my might. The storieskeep changing fromthem from one to the next. My child Nattassiahad also told me thatDFS told her that sheis worth $16,000 andthat my baby is worth $40,000.00. These werethe same people who told my daughter that my whole family hated her and that we were all crazy.



I Carlila Sherman wasin alot of pain for two days after those guardshurt me. I was bleedingfor two of those daysbut I stopped bleedinguntil I had gone backhome and then I bled every day for the nexttwo and 1/2 months. Somedays were light bleedingbut others were not. Ikept thinking that theyhad possibly aborted mybaby from me. I had toldDr. McCorcle what theydid to me. He was not too happy and let mesee my baby alive forthe first time on theTV like monitor. He hadwanted to make sure thateven though another doctorchecked my baby out byonly listening to my babysheart beat 37 hours after the incident happened. Ifelt alot better to seeher alive and playinginside of me. I even watched her fall asleep.This was one of the mostprecious moments of mylife. The doctor probalyonly did all of this forthe fact that my brothertold them that I neededto see what was wrongwith my baby and as towhat had happened whenI was locked in thatpsyc ward. Frankly theywere all afraid of mybrother. They told me so and even threatened me with not having adoctor to take care ofmy baby if my brotherever came in to theirplace just to make surethat I was taken careof immediately. I don'tappreciate people makingthreats to me to savethemselve from a harmthat isn't there. Yetthat is exactly what the administrater andher personel Assistancedid. They said theirsecretary was afraidand scared for her ownlife around my brother.Hog wash all he did wasto try and make sure that after I was hurtgoing in that psyc wardthat my baby was doingwell. They probaly knewthat he was not goingto take anyones bullcrap and that my doctorwould in fact take care of me. That's all he hadwanted was for me to beconsidered safe. Yet theythreatened me.



I went home and could not believe that Arthur Olsen had the gall to call my house and see if I was okay after he helped Sandra Baker tohave me hurt. Oh I was mad. You give orders tohurt me then it happens and you act so dang proudof your work. Innoway was I happy about this. They even tried to get my car taken away the night theyhad me locked up. My friend drove the car to her house and they told her that theywanted the keysto my car. Theytold her the carbelonged to themand that theywere there topick it up. Yet I was up to date on my car payments.So she called mewhile I was locked up and told me that she had infact refused tojust hand over the car keys tostrangers. So myfriends blocked the vehicle inso they couldn't come and remove it.Yeah I decided tocall Arthur Olsenback and I endedup that he putSandra Baker onthe phone. I toldher that you didyour best to tryand kill me and my baby but I amstill alive and I am your worse night mare. Shetold me well youtrying to kill yourself. I thenasked her when?She said wellyou said it the other day. I thentold her the truth.That I was totally with it and I wastrying you to see what in the heckyou were up to.Then I told her I taped everything.So quit lying tome right now. Boyshe was upset thatI could play her.She told me that noone does that toher but she willrecuse herself from my case. Itold her you orArthur had best of not gone to court today for you were fired onthe 28th of Oct.She got mad and hung up. Oh well,I am not the one whom had started this war. She didwith her lies toput me and thishere unborn child at risk.



November 17th 2006



I am still stuck hereat Cox North and yet Iam still locked up. Ihad court this morningbut they told me that Icouldn't go to court.I had been deliberatelylocked up so that I wasgoing to miss court. Thehospital staff kept ontelling me to relax andthat my lawyer wouldtake care of it for me. I told them that this is what I am afraid of cause my lawyers werefired last wensday andI will be suing themfor showing up when they have been fired.They looked at each other like they werevery confused. I was released at noonon this day. Exactly atnoon. The social workerat their hospital told that I had to go andsee a pychologist that they couldn't release me until I did that. Itold her that what aredoing is called corecionand it is against thelaw. She told me thatthese are their rules.I told her to hurry upfor I wanted to go homedays ago and get out of this town. She told me I couldn't have Dr. KeithNobble that I had to have one they sent me to. Tojust have to listen toher ordering me around made me want to screamat her. I was refused once again my right tolive as I want. Like Iwas still under the power of Rodger by theStockholm Syndrome he had put me through. Ifelt like everyone of the people were under Rodgers control issues.I told her that you aregoing against my rightsand that you all havethreatened me from dayone and this controlcrap has got to stop somewhere. She went onahead and made me anappointment with a doctor Jack Greenhall. This was against my wishes and against my religous beliefsas I already informedher of her rights.



I was highly upsetand missing my childthis day. All I hadwanted was to go home.But Dr. Epinosa justwouldn't let me go.He told me we mightbe able to negotiateafter this weekend.I missed going to work and my friends.I couldn't stand thewalls. I felt themclosing in on me. Iwanted to die causeI was locked up. Theworld was out thereand in open spaces.I was thinking thatmaybe I should of stayed buried alive.It was better thenbeing punished forcalling a cop on a man for hurting you.I didn't understandwhy I had been beingpunished for callingfor help. I hated thecolor of those wallsand slowly they were driving me nuts. Iwas again trapped inthat hole that Rodgerdug and I was dying.I was trapped in myanger for justice wasnot being done to me.I am clostraphobic andthey locked me up justlike he did when he hadburried me alive. Is this justice to rip a person inside andout? I kept saying whyme God? Why are youtesting me? I could not stand the torturethat I they had put methrough. I kept lookingup to the skies and Iwas wondering if there was a possibilitie Icould jump out theirwindows and escape fromthis hell I have yet to be put in again. I keptasking God why do I haveto keep paying for Rodger?Why are they letting him win? He said check mate that you bitch I willalways win where ever Iam at. So why were theyletting him win from aprison cell? I couldn'tbreathe the walls by2:00Pm had finally shutme in myself and I hadexploded and walked outof a room. I needed toget out and quick. I was about to lose it being locked up. Thiswasn't right and there was no fairness to it.I was caught betweenmy fears of the walls closing in on me. Iwent back to my room and started crying. Iwas shaking so badly.Of course one of the psyc ladies followedme and another person whom had become like a friend. Right behind me they came. I tried turning over the bed in anger but It waspinned to those dang floor. I was ranting and yelling that I shouldn't have to payfor the sins of others.It's not right to locksomeone up that is likeme highly clostraphobic.I yelled at them to getout. I am hurting in mystomache and noone heregives a shit. I yelled at them to leave me inpeace for I am in hellbeing here. That Rodger was right that checkmate he is winning andbeing here I will diebeing locked up like a damn dog. Both of themhad done their best totry and talk to me but I was pissed off. I waslocked in a cage so Itore all the covers offof my bed and screamedat them that I was beingpunished for calling acop. For him touchingmy daughter that all Ineeded was to get out of this damn cage right now and to be free toroam. I slowly slid down the wall and had a good cry. All I kept sayingwas why me God? Why me? About the time I wasgetting upset again aman walked into my room and ordered both of themto leave my room. I kept thinking this man is sotall. Who is he? Well thepsyc lady had the verysame question in mind inher head and she asked him who he thought hewas to order her from the room? He looked herup and down. If lookscould kill his would ofcause he glared at herand told her that he ismy Attorney and if shedoesn't leave the roomthen he will sue her onmy rights being violatedto have protection fromharm. I knew then who called him. Why my powerof Attorney did and thatis the way he is. I sawthrough the light thenand knew that now I amgoing to be protectedand noone could touch me ever again there. The psyc lady and mynew friend left theroom quicker then I could of thought. Helaughed. This was thefirst lawyer I seenlaugh. He said he justloves when people run.I started laughing andI knew that he wasn't going to put up with no crap from noone. Iactually liked this lawyer. He nodded at me and smiled and saiddon't worry I wont let them hurt you any moreand by the way how areyou doing? I told himthat I am being held prisoner there and Iam clostraphobic. Itold him that thesewalls were closing inon me. He told me thatthis is understandableespecially with thesecolorfull walls. I hadlaughed again. He knewthat the color was awfuland horendous. He wasrolling his eyes at thecolor. He then told me whom had sent him. I told him I had kindafigured that out myselfcause you act like himand he is my power ofAttorney. He explainedthat I needed to sit tight and to hang in there for he is my rayof hope a gift from God you could say. Ilaughed again and toldhim now how would youknow that? He said causeyou asked God for help about oh a couple ofhours ago and oh bythe way he says to tellyou to have patiencewith him and in timehe will guide you andyou will have strengthand power beyond yourmeans. At least youwill think this. Soyou are to keep up thefaith and don't worryabout these ugly walls so much. Soon you will be released from yourprison so buck up okay?I nodded. I had givenhim my paperwork and he waved as he left. Hehad never said what hisname was and I thoughtthat that was strange.For who was that man?It was obvious thatGod had sent me one of his people but whowas he? How did he knowthat I had asked Godfor his help? I felta light feeling takeover me and soon thatlight felt like I wasshining in my insides.I then apologized toGod and asked him toforgive me for being mad at him and thiswhole world and yetthinking that maybehe had abbandoned me.As one could say the devil was trying methis day and I couldof fallen flat yetGod came to save mefrom all evil thatwas trying to surroundme inside and out. Yetagain he was testingme for my faith in him.This attorney had come back on Monday to letme know that all is well and yet I still didn't catch his name from him. I will tell you theone thing I had onlyone more problem with was one person there on Saturday morning.He had told me I wasn'tallowed to go to sleep.But after he did that someone went and took him aside and told himto be nice to me Ihave a very powerful Attorney and he willget him into troublefor misconduct. Hecame back and told me that if I was so tired I could sleep out in the hall on the couch.I had listened to whatthe other guy had told him and it just made me laugh. Everyone nowwas afraid of gettinginto any more troublefrom this attorney butthey still kept tryingto force me to sign the form to stay there.I kept telling them I refuse to sign anything.I would politely handit back to them. Theyhad even threatened tocancel my Medicaid. Itold them to go aheadand do it but I willtell people that youall tried to make menot be able to take care of my baby andthat people would seethat as attempted murder.I was feeling stronger.



Continued for October 29th TO THE 30TH OF 2003
I called my familyright after I wasput through this kindof hell. Cox North refused to give me anything to eat. Iam pregnant and I was not allowed to eat. I had not eaten anything since 9:00AM.and here it was almost12 hours later. Well they did eventually give me crackers andwater. Talk about thisfeeling like prison. Ihad no idea at that time I was diabetic.I couldn't understandhow come I was shakingand feeling cold tothe bone because I had no food for atotal of over 27 hours.I was freezing to deathand later it came upthat I was a type twodiabetic. Another wordsI had been slowly beingkilled by the people atCox North Hospital. You see I couldn't eatthe morning of October30th 2003 for what keptme from not eating wasI was paralized from the neck down. I feltthe intense pain butI couldn't move. Theygave me aspirin forthe pain. I am alergicto aspirin. My bodyfeels like it is drunkand I am overly giddywith laughter but theytold me it was the only thing that I could havefor pain. Oh goody justgreat. They tell me this just after theyhad me swallow it. Wellisn't that just nice of the hospital to do? Trykilling people cause that is what happenswhen my thoughts canrace if I take aspirin.I am not a good pill taker. My body doesn'tseem to like takingmedicine. I get a veryweird high and can't sleep even with takingsleeping pills. I takea sleeping pill I willbe up for 2-6 months.Aspirin I dance aroundand act nuts. I havebeen told that I docrazy thing even withprescribed narcotics.That's why I do notdo very well takingany kind of medicine.My body just doesn'tseem to like drugs ofany kind. So why take medicine that you areallergic to? You aren'tsuppose to and had I of known before hand that that is what they were giving meI would of told themto please take it away. Just like I did thatafternoon at 1:07PMwhen they told me thatthey had my medicineready for me. I askedthem what medicine?When I was at home Ionly had to take mypregnancy pill, thepill singular and mybreather Albeterol.They showed me thepills they had for me in a little cup.I told them first ofall I will not takethese two pills out of four because theseare psychotrophic drugsand I am not nuts and refuse to put my baby in any more harms way.That's when I took those two pills andthrew them at her. Itold her you all canstuff it just like I told that psyc lady screw you I refuse to take any poison in mybody. Plus is it justme or are you all bigidiots in this hospitalor what? The young lady hadwanted to know how I knew which drugs were different? I then toldher first of all don'tyou ever try and foola CNA which means thatI am a Certified NurseAssistant in the state of Missouri and withbecoming one of the best CNA's in MissouriI am not dumb by far.So don't push me andtry to pass drugs ontome without knowing thatI do know what alot of those drugs look like.Know this I am not tobe said to be stupid like any of these otherpeople whom are in here.I am not insane, I donot hear voices and Ilisten and watch everylittle thing that each and everyone of you do.So beware of me and ohby the way my stomache is still hurting and Ikeep bleeding. I want my doctor called ASAPand for him to check me out. I also want tomake a report on the hospital guards beatingme up at orders of DSSand Sandra Baker. This young lady wasnice enough that I hadno qualms with her butthe fact that I heard her tell them when shewent to get the sheetwith a incident report for me to fill out thatI wanted my own doctorto see me. They nevertold him what had happened and he was quite shocked by thegoings on of the othercox hospital when Igot out and went tomy appointment withhim after I got out.I filled out theirincident report andgave it to them 3days later. They hadrefused to sign it.But that's okay Ihave my copy of itand the other mainpart the hospital record where it doesstate about this hereincident happening.Yup the one doctor whom had come to check me out that night really put all of this on the records that were from the hospital for Cox Hospitalsand on my records. It's in bold Print. Well wasn't that nice of them to of done for me tohurt another and then put it in theprinting of thosehospital records ofmine? I felt sopriviledged thatthey had chosen meso that I can now sue the heck out of them and DSS(called back them DFS) fordamages done to meand my unborn child.



OCTOBER 29TH 2003 I showed up at Sandra Bakers office at 10:00 Am. I didn't get in until10:19AM. I was just goingto go out the door andleave when Sandra Baker along with Arthur Olsen came out through the doors. Sandra Baker hadgrabbed a hold of my arm and I had to yank my arm away from her.First of all I did noteven know who she was for I had not ever been introduced to her. All she did wasgive me her card onceand said that she wasmy lawyer. No name except on card and when I called her office for her she never called back but once to tell me that Arthur Olsen wasalso my Attorney. Yetshe only had left me a message about this.Since June 2003 toyesturday and today I had not even seenher but once. Whenshe had grabbed me by the arm I was bythen highly upset.I don't like anyoneto touch me. Sandra Baker asked me whereI thought I was going?I told her to mind herown bussiness. I told her you are fired. Ihad turned around and Arthur Olsen ended upgetting behind me toblock my way. I toldSandra Baker I don't know who you are. She said, I am your attorneySandra Baker. Her hair was different then the day before. She didn't look like the very same woman. It kind of hadfreaked me out with herhair being different and her having makeupput on her face. Shelooked like she hadtwo totally differentpersonalities with herself. It was weird. When Arthur Olsen hadblocked my way to getout of their buildingI Carlila Sherman wastrapped. That gave Mrs.Sandra Baker access tograb me again by my arm and she shoved mefrom behind and told me that they neededme to go inside rightthen. I was afraid ofwhat was going on andvery confused. I feltthreatened all I hadwanted to do was to go home. I had just been in a car accident and I was still veryshook up over it andI had told Sandra Bakerjust that. Yet she hadinsisted that they just needed to talk to me. They had both pushed meinto a big conferenceroom. It was pretty bigand I felt like I was out of my own element. Before I could even sit down andget comfortable Sandrahad started yelling at me and throwing theseaccusations at me. Liketelling me that she knew that I had sexually abusedmy daughter. I was upsetand very angry. For this was suppose to of been myattorney whom all of this time was suppose to of protect me from harm.Yeah right. Just whatin the heck was going on? I looked her in the eye and told her youare stupid and not worthmy time. For I have nevertouched my child nor didI ever look at her wrong!so you are dead wrong andI do not care whom you think that you are but I will always love my little girl. I told her to stick it in her rear.I stopped talking but she just kept on trying toantagonize me. She evenstarted asking me how come I was upset? Yetshe kept doing just that.The thing was I wasn'tupset at all. At leastnot at that time. I wasjust frustrated that shewould accuse me. The one who saves lives not takeparts of them away frompeople. I held myself ona pedestal. Maybe just too high. Alot of times I felt invincible. Like nothing could really touchme nor harm me. But on this day I found out that I was totally wrong aboutlife. I could actually be touched and harmed by myown Government. The peopleI looked up to. My world was once again rocked andthis time I almost tumbled when reality kicked in bywhat I did next and what they did in return. The more Sandra Baker hadkept saying that I had donethis to my kid is when I got the feeling that she was up to something. Now if only I could find out what it is. I brainstormed for then I figured out aplan. So I acted like Iwas changing to a differentpersonalitie. You see Itook Drama years ago andthey taught us to do stufflike this. So I knew whatto do exactly. I know it sounds bad to of done thisbut I had never done anyharm in this when I havedone it before. Drama isgood for the soul. Alot of people do it in eachand every day of theirlives. I just do it for fun. I use to enjoy thethrill of the chase untilthis day when hell came over and I was racked by people who surrounded me and were idiots to of not known me at all. I thought that it was veryharmless as to what I was doing but I hadsoon found out that trouble was on the horizon and people are so naive in thisworld. It felt good to be acting. I have always wanted to be an actress. For SandraBaker it was a game I guess I played only too well. In the end I figured out that Iwas stupid to of doneany acting cause of the danger that thislawyer Sandra Bakerhad put on me and myunborn child. One of the things thatI had drawn a picture ofa church and acted like I was five years old. I know that what I did was wrong. But at thistime I had idea thatmy baby and I was in danger and I didn'tthink as to what Idid had been goingto do any harm toanyone. Plus I hadwanted to see what this witch was up to. But before Icould even haverealized what was going to happen 2 uniformed officershad shown up. Rightbefore they showed up Sandra had asked me,"if I had wantedto call anyone?"I asked her,"now why would I want to dothat?"This is before I had started acting out my cause. I had told her,"no" and I "said that I don't know why she shouldwant for me to go and call someone." I guess I shouldof taken the phone call and called for someone. For Sandrahad asked me if I had remembered the drawing that I drewwith the picture of the church. I said No but I was lying. I remembered it and I thought that we were still playing the game. This hereconversation was saidin front of the twoofficers. Sandra hadtold me that I wasneeded to go andgo with these heretwo officers. I told her that they weremen and I was not going anywhere withthem. She told methat I had no choice.I told her I am not going with them afterthey let a man buryme alive and that they are the cause of it. Then I told her that I would toPlease like to have that phone call now.Sandra Baker thensaid you had your chance and you blewit. Now you can't call anyone for anyhelp. It's too lateCarlila. If only Icould of wiped that grin right off of her face. But I hadheld my own. Sandra had theseofficers try and get a hold of me and they jerked onmy arms to grab ahold of me. Arthur Olsen had just satthere with his headhung low this wholeentire time. He hadknown what she wasgoing to do and allhe could do was sit there and let her do this to me. Thatis pretty low. I had told one of those officers that I needed to reallyget something from my car. This did not feel right. As to what this officer had done by pokinghis head into the car with me. Geez he acted like I was going to kill myself. For he wanted to knowwhat I was doing and if I had any sharp objects in the carthat I might of beengetting a hold of. I just looked at him like he was nuts. I also had told him tomind his own bussiness.I believe that I madehim mad for he jerked on my right arm andpulled me back awayfrom my car. I hadnever got what I hadwanted from my car. The next thing Iknew he went and opened up his backcar door and told me to get in. I toldhim I don't ride in the back seat of anyvehicle. He pushedme into his vehicle.After he did that Ifelt a sharp pain inmy stomache when I tried to turn aroundto get out of hisvehicle. I am verypregnant and highlyclostraphobic. Yethere I am being lockedin a vehicle. I hadno way to get out.The doors to thisvehicle wer lockedand I was having alotof trouble breathing.I don't think thatthis was very funny of the Springfield Police Department toof done to someone.My tummy pain was getting worse. Icould not believethat they would do this to me. Theofficer came backand asked me if Iwas not sure if Iwould go to thehospital I said sure and then I will tell them about my tummy hurting and thatyou did it whenyou had twistedmy body when you had put me into this vehicle. Itold him to take me to St. Johns orto my doctor. Hetold me that I wasto only go to Cox North. I told himit is against my religion to go to a hospital that I do not want to go to. He told me thatis tough for I willgo where he says Iwill go. I was forcedto go to a hospitalagainst my will and my religion. When I had gotten out of the Police vehicle my legs hadcollasped out fromunderneath me. The reason for this is because of all of the stress and thefact that I have anacute Spinal disorderand when that officerhad shoved me he hadknocked some more of my disks in my back out and my nerves werepinching very badly.I felt them slip evenfurther and I was nohappy camper. I knew then that something was seriously wrong with me and that I was going to feel the pain worse later.This had happened tome only several timesbefore for about the last 17-18 years sinceI had been in a verybad accident when Iwas younger. When I had collaspedthe officer and hispartner were yellingat me to get up off of the ground. I toldthem I couldn't moveand that I needed somehelp for my legs arenumb. Just to pleasegive me a hand and slowly my feeling willcome back. They did it but too fast for I hadalmost had my legs giveout from under me again.I held onto the side oftheir vehicle for they were willing to let me fall and I would of done just that without it. I had to steadymyself and make surethat I could actuallywalk first. I don't think that they hadwanted to help me at all. Yet someone frominside brought out awheelchair for me to use. I sat down in it. It ended up that I was wheeled into thehospital and that theonly thing that was going to be done was for them to check my stomache out for itwas hurting reallybad there too alongwith the sharp painsin my legs. I wasthrough with this hospital Cox Northor so I thought. Ihad been tested foralmost everything. Inever received anyreport on how my baby was nor on what was wrong with me. Theykept my cathetar inme and a doctor came to tell me that theyneeded to do a psyceval. I asked what in the world for?I am pregnant andall I am here foris to get my stomachechecked out and that is it. He patted myknee and told me to just sit tight. A little while latera lady came in and hadtold me that she wasthere to do a pysc eval. I told her to leave my room and toplease get out cause she is upseting me and I don't want youhere. She kept tryingto ask me questions but I ignored her andacted like she wasn't there. She was being a pain in the ass. Idon't know whom she thought that she was but she was not goingto upset me and thebaby inside of me. Orso I had thought. Shefinally left. I wasthanking God. The doctor finallycame back into the room to tell me thatthey were going tocome and take out mycathetar. During the hours that I was thereI had kept calling mystepmom. I didn't knowwhat these yo yos were up to. But I wish I really could of taken a guess. This is thejest of things is thatthey wanted me locked up because I am havebeen fighting them.So in turn they hadattemepted to kill me and my unborn child on this day. They came very closeto succeeding and Iam sorry to say thisbut as to what theydid next I put a tortwith the intent to Sue every single oneof these people whomdid what they had done next. I willshow you all proofpositive that this in fact happened. Iam going to have a friend of mine put the copies on this Web site. I am goingto tell you what hadhappened next. Forthose of you that want to throw up.Please feel free to do it. Afterall I have beensick by what hasbeen happening andstill is going oneven today. I went ahead andhad gotten dressedafter they took mycathetar out. I hadthought that they were done checking me out so I dressedmyself. Think of itthis way noone likesto be in a hospital gown and running allaround the hospitallike that. I feel cold in there like that. That's one ofthe other reasons why I put my clothesback on. The doctorhad already come inand told me that hewould be back in afew minutes anywaysand everything wouldbe taken care of. Henever came back. Iwaited for over an hour and when I wentto go and call mystepmom again waswhen all hell brokeloose. I heard thedoors to the hallwaybeing shut. At that time I had the phonein my right when I turned around whenthey slammed shut.The Pysc eval ladywas blocking thearea to the doors.This was as I waslooking over my left shoulder. Ithen saw her nod at someone to my right. I saw two armed guards comingdown the hall. Thepsyc lady yelled atme to get my ass off of the phone.I told her that Ineeded to call my stepmom. She told then told me thatI had plenty enoughtime on the phone this evening. The time was only 3:37Pmand I had been thereonly for the last 4 hours. I went aheadand started dialingand glared at her.She had no right intelling me that Icould not talk tomy family. But evenbefore I knew what was going to happen the guard had yanked the phone out of myhand and slammed myfingers with the phone.I screamed at him notto hurt me and my baby.I became afraid for my life. I thought that when he had shoved meback that I was goingto be killed. I was pushed back into the psyc eval lady and she pushed me towards the room. That's when she told me to get outof my clothes and toput my gown back on.I told her no. I am not going to do it.I got part of the way back out of the room and tried to make a run for the doors. Your talking about somebody whois pregnant running for their life. Ididn't even make itto the doors when Iwas caught by herand she told me justto relax and do as they say. That's whenI told her that I amleaving and going on vacation or going togo to work so she hadbetter get out of myway for I was not going to put thatGown back on! I was mad and I had feltvery threatened byher and for my baby.But there was nowayfor her to order mearound and to tell me to do somethingagainst my will. Idid not want anythingto happen to my baby.I was more threatenedby her when she pushedme back into the roomand told me again to strip or these men would do it for me.Both guards advanced towards me and theystarted grabbing at my clothing when shehad told me that if I didn't do it thenthese guards could do anything they hadwanted to me and she would just turn herback and not pay anyattention. So they were trying to forcemy clothes off of meand have their way with me. I finallyscreamed at them toPlease stop and I'llchange. These guards had meant to rape me.By then I was wishingfor death. What they had done was not rightand I felt violated.Yet if things could get worse they did.I had just finished putting my gown backon and put my jacket over it when the ladyhad come back in withthe guards in tow. Ihad my money belt withall of my life in itwhen she demanded to have it. I told herno for this is mylife in here. She tried yanking themoney belt from mebut I held tight.Yet again she hadthreatened me withthe guards again. Iknew that this waslike the end of the line for me. I tookthe pictures of mydaughter out andhanded her my money belt. That is whenshe yelled at me and told me to handover the picturestoo. I told her toscrew you and that these are my picturesof my daughter. Thatis when I had no ideathe extremes that shewould actually take.She then told the guards to take me down that DFS and Sandra Baker haveall given orders forme to be taken down.I was elbowed twice in the stomache and knocked to the floor.It hurt so bad thatI couldn't move. Shewas yelling at me toget up but I couldn'tmove. The guards and her picked me up off of the flor and they slammed me hard when they had put me in a wheel chair. All I could do was cry for my baby inside was hurting me. I was taken upstairssomewhere and in pain.Noone at that time had paid any attention to me when I was screamingmy baby is hurt. I couldfeel it. Something wasdone wrong to my baby and they did it to me.I never thought thatanyone would ever harman unborn child but they did and thatwill be kept for meto tell at another time. When they tookme upstairs they dideverything possibleto me to make sure Ifelt degraded. I was drilled on questionsfirst and ignored themto the hilt for I wasin pain and they didnot care about me or my pain nor my baby.The next step was forthem to strip searchme and I mean a fullstrip search. As in a pole up your ass andbending you over evenif it hurts. Then theyspread your butt cheeksand stick a pole thing there in your hole and it hurts. So what is alittle pain who knows?Not me. This was themost severe treatmentand degradation of lifeone could ever have. Ithen had these peoplea man and a woman whomdid all of this to me,that also lifted up mybreast and they had tolook and touch me inevery way possible. Ialmost bit the man forhe was even checking my teeth and I justwanted to go and lay down and rest to maybe help my pain. It took them almost threehours for them to get done doing this. I had blood running down my legs and they nevergave a hoot about thedanger my baby had been put in and the dangershe was at that timein. It was 7:39 PMwhen they finally gotdone with me and letme call my family. Iwas suppose to take my mom to her doctors Appointment the verynext morning. My mom had almost died becauseof them. She was highlyupset that she didn't have a way to get toher doctors Appointmentnow for they put me ina lock down Unit in thepysc ward. Sandra Bakertold them I was goingto kill myself. This is against my religion.I was not even told thatI was going to be locked up. So when I asked themif I could go home theylaughed at me. I toldthem that if my motherhas even the slightestheart attack I will be suing you all. Take aguess what did happen.My mom was so upset shetried to reach her heartmedicine but fell to the floor having chest pains with noone to help herup. She finally crawledand got to her medicinebut had trouble openingthe bottle. She endedup having to take allthree nitro pills in order for her to stayalive. She told me whathad happened when I hadgone back home. One of brothers took her tothe doctors appointment and had to get off of work to bring her backhome. He was not veryhappy that this was done to me his sister and neither was onewho is my power ofAttorney. He calledfor a lawyer almost immediately. He knew that noone but him had the power to lockme up but him. He was also highly upset. Mymom was left for deadby the uncaring ways of these people. Youjust don't do this to people. Hurt them anyways you can but theydid. Please read thenext insert on what happened for the rest of my stay.



October 28th 2003 I went to Sandra Bakersoffice whom was supposeto of been one of mylawyers, along withArthur Olsen being theother one. I had handedSandra Baker a letter at5:07P.M. The letter wasto inform her that her and Arthuer Olsen were fired for not helpingmy case ever at alland both of them werenot doing their job.I walked out of her(Sandra Bakers) officebefore she could read the paperwork. Half anlater Sandra Baker callsme up at home and saysthat she and Arthur Olsen would like to have a meeting withme in the morning at10:00 AM. I said sure whatever. I didn'teven have a clue as to what kind of gamethese lawyers had been about to play next. Yetif I could turn backthe clock. I would ofnever of gone becausemy unborn child wasput at great risk. Ijust had no clue. Notone person ever toldme how powerfull and what our own Governmentwould do to you andyour person. I knew that the Governmentwas powerfull but Idid not know that they would go to the extra mile totry and kill me andmy unborn child. Ihad no clue as towhat was going tohappen. I am stillmad about what our Government put methrough and I findit hard to forgive.



AUGUST 29TH 2003 I got to see my daughter again today. But half way through she got upset causeDFS now called DSS has rulesand their rules state that at no given time am I allowedto iniate conversations or any kind of hugging. That theonly one whom can do this ismy daughter Nattassia knownas the child and she has todo it herself. I was onlyfollowing thier rules. Mydaughter had gotten up andwent out of the room, while stomping her feet in the process. She was ranting and raving that she felt like the parent cause I didn't speak first. This was all because I didn't start the conversation firstbecause I was folowing DFSrules. My daughter was highlyupset cause of me folowingthier rules. She was so veryupset so I left cause it wasfor the best. On my way out Holly Cooperthe caseworker had grabbeda hold of my wrist a yanked my arm in the process and then she had the gall to tell me that I didn't haveto follow all of thier rules.I think to myself so whichis it? I was brought up that rules were not to be broken. DFS taught me that.They made sure that no rule of thiers was to be ever broken. So now I have infact become highly confused.What kind of games is DFSplaying with me? Every timeI turn around they want rulesbroken or to have new rules.I was thinking at this timethat I will never know what they will do next. But I had taken several wild guesses and came to a conclusion that the games were only begining and that I was not going tosee my daughter againbecause of these idiots.I didn't go to the second floor of the DFS buildingto play games as in to OBEYor DISOBEY with thier rules that they wont give me spaceto understand what is goingon. I am sorry but it is justgetting a little old by nowwith them playing these kidsgames with me. I had felt like I was on a rollar coasterride and thier is no way off and I still feel like that.


Conversation changed from one to the next

August 24th 2003
My daughter had toldme that the man Rodger Curry,whom had been inour house living withus,had been sexuallyabusing her for awhile.I asked her how come shenever told me? She said she felt like the other women. She's a child andI told her that. I toldher that I guess my friend Gary was right. That is when she interupted andsaid what no, that is theman whom you were takingme to off of the internet.I looked at my daughterand then told her you arewrong. I was not takingyou to him. I was goingto see him all by myselfwithout you until youpulled your stunt withbreaking my nose on the 8th of June. My daughter was confused then. Shelooked at her counselorthen at me and then saidbut I thought that you were taking me to seehim. I explained to my child that he did nottrust you and never everwanted to meet you. She was upset and told mebut why did you call him?I told her that he wantedto make sure that you wereokay cause he knew that something caused you totry and force drugs down my throat and hit me inmy nose. He thought thatyou were getting verydangerous. That is when Nattassia said but I have always been a good kid. Idon't think that she hadreally ever believed me.What she thought was notwhat had been going on tobegin with. I could tellthat she was upset by thisinfo but that is tough fortelling lies about what hadbeen really going on is not something that I do. I was shocked that my childhad changed our conversationfrom what Rodger did to herto this. She never had fully explained to me what went onbetween Rodger and her. Itseemed that she what she hadwanted was to find out aboutmy good friend Gary instead.I just wanted to know what in the heck did go on while I was at work. She never did tell me at that time. I waseven more shocked that my daughter had mentioned thatRodger had done somethingsexual to her seeing howthe medicine he took madehim unable to have sex. Forhe couldn't get it up forthe medicine prevented himfrom doing just that. Istill have the pamplet hisdoctor gave him to give methat it was immpossible forany medicine to even helphim to get it up. But whenmy child did not tell me any details or anything Iwondered about how much was she not telling meand whether she was lying to me and them about it. Itold her that I believed her but I really didn't. Nothing matched with thereality of things.

Monday, January 09, 2006



Some where around August 25th or 26th 2003.
I opened up my frontdoor and the detectiveLori Everett is standingon my door step. She hadwanted to know if she could come in. I asked her how come. She toldme that they could do this the easy way or the hard way. I asked her what did she mean?She said that she needed my signature on thispiece of paper she hadfor they needed to ripup my carpet and getsome samples from it.She then told me thatif I didn't do it thatthey were going to haveto go to a judge and get a court order yet they would rather getme to coroperate withthem and that they would let the courts know that I did do somecoroperating with them.I asked her why would need to rip up some ofmy cartpet? She saidthat they needed it tocomplete my daughters case against Rodger. Isigned the piece ofpaper cause I figuredthat if I didn't theywould use it against me. She used a bunch of lights and asked mequestions about Rodgerand myself having sex.We never had sex but Ilied and told her that we did. I thought thatthe reason Rodger hadnever had sex with mewas cause he couldn't perform. He was one ofthe frist men who didn'tseem to want me for sex. I told her that eventhough I had an exparteagainst Rodger that hecontinues to call me.Some were threats othershe wanted me to talk tohim. After what he had done to me I didn't want to talk to him. Frankly I was scared to deathof him. If he knew Iwas alive he would ofcome back and killedme. I knew that he wastrying to drive me overthe edge and so did he. I was asked questionsafter questions by the detective. She tried to make me feel comfortable around her. But anythingabout Rodger made me feelansy. I was mad at thewhole world. Noone couldunderstand that anyoneasking questions aboutRodger would make me madbeyond belief after allthe system screwed up and let him get awaywith trying to murder me. So I was on edge and I had every right to be. Even when she listened to the messages that Rodger left me. Iwas frozen in place andcouldn't move. Lori said something to me and I didn't hear her. It was like I was in a trance.I asked her,"what did she say?" She repeated thathe had sounded Meticulousdidn't he? I said yes, yeshe did. The detective stayed there for about four hours. I wasgreatfull when she had left.I felt better when noone wasaround. Yet, after she leftreality kicked in and I hadbroken down and cried likeI never had before. I criedfor myself, my child and forlife that had treated me so ever badly. I missed my childgiving me hell all the time.I would tell her to do one thing like the dishes andshe would laugh at me andsay she was going to tellGrandma on me and say Iwas trying to force herto do child Labor. She hadeveryone wrapped around her fingers but me. I knewwhat she was about and knewthat no matter what shecouldn't con me. She wasalways trying to. But byher not telling me about what Rodger did to her I felt that indeed she hadfinally found somethingto con me about. Later on after I had wentthrough all of this LoriEverett the detective hadleft a message that theyhad caught Rodger and thathe was being held on a bondfor $250,000. I so greatfullthat he was behind bars. Atlast he was thrown in jail.



AUGUST 25th 2003 I made a phone callto one Holly Cooperat 11:58 AM. I hadinformed her that Idid not appreciateSusan Benson hittingmy kid Nattassia andalso her counselor-Mindy Ellis squeezingNattassia's shoulders and shaking her in the process. I toldHolly that this isblantant child abuseon my child and I wontstand for it. I told her that I wanted to file a complaint withthe abuse hotline onboth Susan Benson andMindy Ellis. Holly hadstated that she would do this immediately. Ihad told her that she had better do it andhave them charged with abuse on my child. She informed me that I can not do that and then hung up on me. I guess that this meansthey don't want charges filed on anyone for abuseon a child. At that time I had no idea that I couldof done it. I thought that Holly Cooper was telling me the truth that there was no way that I could do it. That's what I get for believing her causenothing was ever filedon it to this date.



JULY 23rd 2003
DSS handed me thisdocument that said that it was a TreatmentPlan. I asked them to please let me take ithome so that I could read it. I explained that I am partial Dislexic. They didn'tcare. They told mefine you take it home and if you don't signit right now then you will never see your kid dead or alive again. Now do you understand what you have to do? Cleo Moehl and Lisa Streetwas the ones whom told this to me. Butyet there is a whole room full of peopleand I am scared ofnot seeing my child ever again. Because of this threat made to me on this dayat 4:18PM I went ahead and signed it. Cause I deeply wanted to see mydaughter again.Judge Thomas Mounjoy was notthere but he signed it later that daysaying he was a witness. Like it was signed in front of him. I did not even have court until October2003. Something was put in writing on this document that had only been found outin August. Another words it was added after it was signed.



August 24th 2003 I went to see Nattassia(my daughter) at 3:00 PMin Mindy Ellis off. I hadto sit in the outer roomfrom the office. The one with all of the chairs andsome toys for kids. Nattassiawasn't there yet. So I just sat down and waited for herto get there. When my childdid get there her foster mom had brought her. They were 9 minutes late. I wasgetting pretty worried fora little bit cause I know how my daughter likes tobe puntual for things. It was when my daughterhad finally gotten there, that I had noticed that mydaughter had acted like she was scared. This hadalerted me to the factthat something is notquite right here withthis picture. My daughterhad run over to me and gave me a big hug like she had never wanted tolet me go. Susan Benson her foster mom hit Nattassiain the back of the head.She told Nattassia to stop hugging me cause she wasnot allowed to touch me.My daughter whacked herback and told her not to ever hit her again. Finally Mindy Ellis hadcome out and took Nattassiain her office first. At thistime I had only had threesessions with my daughter and Mindy E. her counselor.I had to have these because of the lies that Susan Bensontold DSS. You see all of theother times I had gotten tosee my daughter a caseworker was only present twice. All of the others they used theFoster Mother whom had wantedto adopt my child. Now isn't that a conflict of Interest if you've ever seen one? Getfoster mom to say something bad about mom especially whenshe tells you to your face that your daughter is now her daughter and that sheis adopting her. That is very cruel and mean in my own opinion. I had to just take this cruel punishment.I felt like I had deservedit for calling the police on a man for beating me up.It was his way of paying me back for calling the cops onhim. Little bit by little Ihave realized that from aprison cell Rodger is infact right. They are lettinghim win. I can't do that.Anyways this foster mom hadalso told DSS that I was talking about Rodger andother men. She would tellDSS that I was telling mydaughter that he has his own case. As far as I had known Rodger was never partof mine and my daughters case.At least that is what I hadthought. The thing is mydaughter had been the onetrying to ask questions about Rodger. I would tellher to never mind anything about him. So here I am beingconfused by whats going on. In the meeting with Mindyeverything went well untilNattassia gave me another hug as I was getting readyto go out the door. She wastelling me that she lovedme very much and misses me.Suffice it to say it upsetme very much as to what hadhappened next. Mindy Ellis squeezed Nattassia's upperarms and shook her causingher to scream out in pain.Mindy told her to quit withhugging and telling me that she loves me, for that is no allowed. My daughter screamedat Mindy to never harm heragain. My daughter had tearsrunning down her face whenMindy Ellis took her awayand into her office. TheFoster Mom Susan Benson went with them. The last thing I saw that day wasmy daughter crying and shewas signing to me in sign Language the I Love You sign.



June 11th 2003
Rodger came home at6:30 AM. to razz meabout Nattassia not being there. I told him that this is your fault. He Said,"ofcourse it is. I toldyou that if you wereto go to the police,that I have you setup that even you can't break it. Now whathave you got to sayBitch? Nothing not a dog gone thing and you know it! Noone and I mean noone canhelp you now! Believeme when I tell younext time, that thepolice will believe me and not you everand they wont believeanything that you haveever told them aboutme." This went on forhours. His ranting andyelling about Tassiabeing gone and how Iwas going to be put away cause I am thebigest Bich. All Icould do was to takeeverything that he hadbeen throwing my waycause I knew that yet again the Police had let Rodger win. By what you will see in the rest of this youwill understand by hisreactions and threats how The SpringfieldPolice Dept let thiernoncompliance with nottaking him into custodydid more damage. It was getting pretty close to the time I hadto leave for my metting with 2 people when Rodger jumped up and came up across the room. He hadgrabbed me by my hairand shoved me against the wall and in doing so he then enclosed hishand around my throat.Rodger squeezed my neck so tight I thought thathe was going to kill me.Instead he told me,"thatI had no choice but to tell them these thingsthat he wanted me to tell them. Other wisewhen we came back on our way back home he would make sure that he was to make a stopat my mothers Apartmentand kill her in front of my eyes." Rodger hadtold me about how he would start by cuttingout my moms Gallblader."I made the mistake oflaughing and he squeezedmy neck alot more tighterthen before. He Yelledat me not to FuckingLaugh for he had beenvery seriously thinkingof doing this for quitesome time. He told me ifI did it again then he would fuckin kill meright there and thenand instantly. You hearme you little cunt? Ithen had tears streamingdown my face and I slowlynodded at him. Rodger hadcontinued by saying,"okay now listen to me and youneed to listen well. I will cut out your moms kidneys and I probalywould finish it up byputting your moms heartin your hands." He lookedme right in the eye andthen told me,"do you knowhow easy the cops haveset it up so that I couldframe you for your motherbeing murdered? So easythey have made it. Don'tyou just love it? I can get away with murder in this little side show townof yours and make theseidiot cops think that you murdered your own Mother."He told me that he wasgoing with me to make surethat I tell everyone whathe wanted me to tell them and if I am not out in onehour then he would makesure that afterwards mymother was dead for sure."He said that,"this was his best setup yet and even that he knew thatthey would bring in adetective." I thoughthe was crazy for what in the heck is he talkingabout and then I realizedthat indeed he would killmy mother and set me upfor her murder. He meantevery word of it. By then I was scared to death. Ihad no idea even what he was meaning by saying adetective. For I was soonto discover that his setupworked and they are stillletting him win. I took off after Rodgermade his threat and I wentgo to my meeting of the 2 people that were supposeto be of been there as towhen I got there. Rodgerwent with me to make surethat everything would go his way and that I would do exactly as he wanted.I followed his lead anddid as he asked after Ihad to wait a long time.Rodger had already rockedthe boat when he went upto thier window and haddemanded to see his daughter.She was and is not his child and I told him soright then and there. Heeven squeezed my armwhen I said that to him.He was mad I could tell.The security man waseven on Guard when Rodgerwas there. I knew this security Guard prettywell and he saw Rodgerdoing what he did. Heeven nodded at me inreconnection to let meknow if I got into anytrouble with him whileI was there that he would take care of it.The longer I waitedthe more frightened I got. When they hadfinally come to take me back I was shaking.I didn't know what hadtaken so long. I didn'tknow how much longer that Rodger was goingto just stand there pacing back and forthbefore he would go tomy moms apartment andkill her if these idiotsdidn't hurry up. Theydidn't seem to realize that I would not of been in this positionif the police had donethier job. Lisa Street had lied to me for there wasnot going to be just a meeting of 2 peopleand only me. There was12 or more people inthis room. For one ofthe things is that I am very Clostraphobic.This is due to another thing that happened while I was in the careof DFS now DSS. The second thing is I waslied to from Lisa Street.This was no meeting of 2 people and I do not like to be lied to. Ihad no idea who any of these people were. The only thing that I had wanted was for them to please hurry up for the clock was ticking awayto tell them these lies and make them think thatI did this what ever hetold me to tell them bynot saying I did. I didnothing wrong but to callcop again for help andnow I have to pay forcalling them. Rodger hadgiven me tops an hour todo this in and indeedbecause of them I wastrapped. All I could think of was to save my mom. Save myself. I don't remember any questions. I do remembertelling them that I ampartial dislexic. Underpresure I can not reador write. But to them this did not matter theysaid that I had to signthis piece of paper. Ihad no idea what it wasat the time cause whenI am under the kind ofpresure that I was under, I really didn'tunderstand what wasgoing on at that time.I knew that I didn'twant my mom to die andthat the Police wouldlet him get away withher being murdered. Iknew that he could ofhad it setup to look like it was me and Iwas scared that yet,again he was going tobe right. Look at allthat had happened so far. When someone putsyou under StockholmSyndrome there is noway out. You have todo everything they tellyou to do or pay theconsequences. As I didso many times before.Noone in this room ofpeople would of under-stood what I had beengoing through and whatI had to do. I am not sure but I believe that the pieceof paper that they had me signed was my Miranda Rights. I keep trying toremember what it was butI can't remember. I canremember something tosay that she can tape me. But I don't remember what it was for and noonewill tell me what it was.Bits and pieces keep oncoming back but I was soscared and am afraid thatI will never remember allof what went on that day. I was never told thatthis hear meeting was ahearing. So from what Iknow of my knowledge andthier paper work that this was not a 72 hour hearing or meeting nordid I have any of themwithin 72 hours by the state laws. I do in factremember before leaving these people that I hadasked them yet again,"doyou all have any paperwork saying that you could keep my daughter. They all ignored me andjust looked at each other and laughed. Notany one of these peoplegave me any kind ofdocumentation statingthat they could takemy child. I don't everremember being asked if I could have an attorney present. Thestate that I was inno one could of askedme for anything andit was not right. Yetalso not fair. Beingput in a bad positionis not very cool. ForDSS and the Springfield Police Department put me in danger by notarresting this verydangerous man. I had hurried throughthis meeting with thesepeople to save my mom.When I did come out thefirst thing that Rodger said when I came out was,"where is Nattassia?" Itold him was,"why don't you ask them? After allI told those lies foryou so that you wouldnot KILL MY MOTHER!" Hethen stomped out of thebuilding ahead of meand his parting words were that you will pay for that Bitch! He saidthis just as we were passing the securityguy. We got into the carand Rodger continued to yell and chastisedme all the way home.He was telling me thatmaybe he should go andkill my mother any ways.He said I didn't lie well enough for them togive me back my daughter.That some how I held back and they kept mydaughter because I wasnot good enough to lie for him. Why did I dothat to him and notlet them give me backmy daughter. Was I out to get him? That onsecond thought maybe he should kill all ofus. My stepmom too and even in front ofmy dad. Yeah that partwould kill your owndad! Then your motheralong with your brothers.Then torture you for notlying to these peoplewell enough for them togive you back Nattassia.He then smacked me upsidethe head and called me a Bitch. He told me thatI would pay. Rodger hadmeant every word he wassaying as I was drivingonour way home. I was very thankful for when I pulled in for by the time I did I was in tearscause he kept whackingme upside the back ofmy head telling me he was going to have greatpleasure in killing me.Well Rodger never didat that time get to tryand kill me cause whenwe had pulled in therecoming up the sidewalkwas the Detective, Lori Everett. As soon as Ihad gotten out of the car the detective hadsomething in her hand and it was a warrant to search my apartment.They took my computerwith everything thatcame with it. Anotherthing that I had foundout was that my daughterhad also told them thatI showed her pornographyfrom my computer. I hadpornography as anothermeans to try and get Rodger out. Not to show to my child. My diskread Not for EYES onthem. The thing I don'tunderstand is why didthe police never askme if Rodger had had a computer and yet theytake mine. The police have never given meback my computer to this day. Yes, I hadfriends whom warned me that with RodgerI was playing a verydangerous game usingthe pornography to gethim to leave. They knew that he would eventuallytry and kill me for whatI was doing.

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